My last year of high school. Yay. In less than 2 months, my senior year would begin. To the good, my college applications were ready to go. Not so good was another year of high school. I had survived so far by trying to be invisible. My hair was long enough to completely hide my face when I tilted my head down. This was important to me because I had what was probably the worst case of acne in the inhabited universe. I didn’t want anyone looking at me. I didn’t want anyone talking to me. I could hear them in my head, making fun of me. Invisible.
Just to remove any doubt about the unfairness of the universe, I had an older sister. Corinne would be starting her first year of college this fall. Having a sister wasn’t unfair, in and of itself. Having a sister with flawless skin who was a total hottie, while I have a face that looked like the surface of Mars was unfair. Not that Cori ever seemed to notice my complexion. She was always there, whenever, wherever, usually with a smile for me.
Pretty much since 7th grade and the start of puberty, my skin was nasty. It was embarrassing. REALLY embarrassing. So I kept to myself at school, did my homework, and started growing my hippy hair to hide my face. I was a straight A student since I had no other demands on my time besides studying. AP classes, a couple evening classes at the community college, I was set for getting into the college I wanted, to study BioChem. Maybe I’d invent something that made acne disappear. A little late for me, but the universe would remember me fondly.
My mother made an appointment for me to see another dermatologist; this guy was supposed to have some magic whatever that would clear up my skin. Gee, haven’t heard this before.
Cori drove me. To her credit, she never mentioned my acne. She just treated me like a normal person, like she could see through my skin to see me underneath. I hated people making fun of me, it’s not like I had bad skin on purpose. My teachers were uncomfortable talking to me, they’d look anywhere but at my face. I don’t think they were trying to be mean, but it still hurt. My parents just had this “oh my god I’m so sorry for you” vibe. Not Cori, she just didn’t see it; which probably contributed to me having a crush on her. Well, that and the fact that she was smoking hot. Volleyball & cross-country had done amazing things to her body. Volleyball shorts were, in my opinion, the single best piece of female clothing ever invented. Or maybe yoga pants. Either or. Possibly both. My sister was the object of my fantasies. All of them. Everything about her turned me on. She was smart, pretty, funny, she had a to-die-for body, green eyes that actually sparkled when she laughed, and the most kissable lips I had ever seen. I always felt like she had my back. I was in love with my big sis.
After Doctor whats-his-name examined my face in great detail, he prescribed some creams and pills and this and that. So Cori & I went to the pharmacy. Wow. This stuff better work, my parents are paying a fortune for it! Happily, we got home soon & I could go to my room, where, as usual, I looked at internet porn of girls who look a lot like my sister. Closing my eyes as I masturbate, Cori is the center of my fantasy. No surprise there.
A month goes by and, believe it or not, this acne stuff is actually starting to work! My skin is clearing up, no new breakouts, and the old ones are fading. I can look in the mirror without feeling humiliated. After another week, I’m actually starting to look like a normal human. And still, Cori never says a word. She just looks at me, long enough for me to get that she’s looking at my skin, and smiles. She never mentioned it when I looked like death warmed over, and she doesn’t mention it now. God, I love her.
One morning, as we’re eating breakfast after the parents have left for work, Cori asks me about my plans for the day. I looked at her like she was crazy; my plan for the day was the same as it always was, look at pictures of naked girls that remind me of my sister and masturbate. Thinking I should probably not share that particular Gaziantep Evi Olan Escort plan with her, I simply said I had no plans at all.
“Go get dressed, we’re going to the mall” said Cori.
“What for?” I asked, rather petulantly. I was already fantasizing about my sister, her ass was just amazing. I wanted to kiss her and touch her and … I wanted to go to my room and masturbate.
“It’s your senior year of school. You’ve filled out over the summer & people are going to notice you. You need some new clothes & a haircut. A new you. Dress for success and all that.”
Yeah, I had “filled out” over the summer. I had nothing to do but masturbate, so I did pushups and sit-ups in between sessions of fantasizing about my sister. I did actually have some upper body definition. What Cori did NOT say was that my acne was gone, and now that I wasn’t so scary looking, people might want to talk to me for a change. They could kiss my ass. They didn’t want to be my friends when I was ugly, I didn’t want to be their friend now that I wasn’t. There was only one girl I cared about, and she wanted to take me shopping. I didn’t really WANT to go shopping, but being around Cori was its own reward. I could put up with some mall time for that.
“Whatever. I’ll be ready in 15 minutes.”
First stop was the hair place. I hadn’t had a haircut in years. When I said I didn’t really care what my hair looked like, Cori had a quiet conversation with the stylist, and she went to work on me. There’s something just slightly erotic about someone washing your hair, so of course, I thought about Cori & was glad the apron thing to catch the hair clippings covered my crotch. Back to the chair, and the girl stared at me for a couple minutes. I was feeling pretty uncomfortable by the time she actually started cutting. I guess she was like the sculptor who sees a statue inside a block of stone, and just has to figure out how to reveal it. All I know is, there was a gigantic pile of hair on the floor around me when she was finally done. Wow. I didn’t even look like me! Short hair, actually styled, I looked like guys in commercials. Not all rugged handsome & stuff, but a slightly above-average looking guy. My black concert t-shirt was looking pretty crappy right about now.
Cori looked at me and just smiled. “Clothes make the man” she said, looping her arm through mine & pulling me into the mall hallway. “Let’s do something about that.”
And so we went to the first of several stores. My idea of clothes was jeans, usually black t-shirts, and sneakers. Cori’s idea of clothes was somewhat different. She found a tape measure in the first store and measured my waist, chest, neck, arms & inseam. The inseam measuring part was interesting. The girl about whom I fantasized on a daily basis was on a knee in front of me with her hand remarkably close to my crotch. Woo-boy! I was storing away that image for after we got home!
I tried on shirts and pants and sweaters and jackets and shoes and boots and I don’t know what else. Five stores later, I felt like a pack mule with all the bags. Turns out Cori had arranged all this with my mother in advance & she had mom’s credit card. God, I love that girl. Finally, we’re done. Almost. We sat down on a bench & Cori started pawing through a couple bags, pulling off tags & moving things from one bag to another. “Here” she said, holding out a bag. “Take this into the bathroom & go change.”
“What?” I asked, completely confused. “Why? Can’t I just wait til we get home?”
“We’re going to lunch, and we’re not going to Burger King. Go change.”
Not seeing any percentage in arguing, I went to the bathroom & changed into the outfit Cori had selected for me. Passing the mirror on the way out, I was surprised at my reflection. I looked pretty good!
Apparently, my sister thought so, too. As I returned to the bench where she was waiting for me, Cori had a huge smile on her face. She stood and passed me a couple of bags. “You look great! Let’s go eat!” she said. Her enthusiasm was contagious; I hadn’t looked at anything except my own feet when I was out in public for so long, it was a whole new experience for me as I walked back to the car with the prettiest girl in the world. I may have actually smiled. That billion dollars my parents spent on braces was finally getting put to good use.
I have no idea where we went for lunch, only that it was on the other side of the city from where we lived. When we got there, I was really glad Cori made me change, I don’t think they would have let me in wearing jeans & a t-shirt. As we entered the dim foyer, Cori slipped her hand into mine, intertwining our fingers. I must have looked like a fish out of water with my mouth hanging open, since Cori quietly laughed and pushed my mouth closed with her fingertip on my chin. Her hand came to rest on my elbow as she squeezed my hand in hers. She was holding me quite possessively as we stepped to the podium and I told the hostess our last name. “This way, please” the hostess said, as she led us to a corner of the dining room.
Though I never had occasion to exercise the manners my mother had taught me on an actual date, I hadn’t forgotten them. I held Cori’s chair for her, pushing it in as she sat. Rounding the table to my own seat, I felt a little giddy. I actually felt like I was on a date with her! Ridiculous, I know, but still. I was sitting in a nice restaurant with a beautiful girl; this was all completely new to me. As soon as I sat, Cori grabbed my hands across the table and squeezed them both. Smiling, she said, “Isn’t this great? I am SO hungry! We should do this all the time! Are you having fun? What are you going to get?”
Oh. My. God! I love this girl! Cori made me feel fantastic. She was so enthusiastic about eating lunch, for heaven’s sake! I felt myself smiling back at her. “Yes. Me, too. OK. Yes, I don’t know.” I said, laughing. Cori looked at me puzzled for a moment before laughing aloud. “Always so literal!” she exclaimed, giving my hands another squeeze before releasing them & picking up her menu. “We should start with an appetizer…”
A thousand hours later, we finally left the restaurant. We had spent the entire meal laughing and talking. Cori had reached across the table constantly, touching my hand or arm with her fingertips. Those touches were electric, I actually tingled every time she touched me. I don’t remember her ever looking away from me the whole time we were there. My sister made me feel like the most fascinating person she’d ever met. As we walked to the car, she clasped my hand again. Holding my elbow with her other hand, she leaned against me as we walked. I could feel her breast brushing against my triceps with every step. When we got to the car, Cori pulled me to a stop and turned to face me. “That was the best lunch date ever!” she said, just before she kissed me on the lips.
Cori squeezed my hand & let it go, walking around the car and opening the door. “Come on! You gonna stand there all day! Let’s go!” Cori exclaimed, sliding into the drivers’ seat. Jolted back to reality, I moved to the passenger door. My sister just kissed me. Okay, she barely brushed her lips against mine, but it was still a kiss! Lunch date? She kissed me!
As I climbed into the passenger seat, my head was spinning. I had NEVER felt like this before! She kissed me! The car started moving. “Jason!”
“What?” I asked, looking at Cori in complete confusion. Had she been talking to me?
“Earth to Jason, earth to Jason! Come in, please!” Cori laughed as she drove. “Where were you, spacing out there for a bit?”
“Huh? Oh. I uh..” I looked down at my lap for a moment before continuing. “That was awesome. The whole thing. I mean, well, the shopping wasn’t that fabulous, but, I had a great time with you today, and lunch was excellent, and, well… thanks.” I was feeling a little embarrassed by the way I felt. I had such a crush on my sister; all I could think about was her breast on my arm and her lips against mine. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and never let go. My eyes closed as I imagined my arms around her waist, my head on her shoulder, and the sigh, the utter and complete let-everything-go everything-will-be-all-right relax…
“You OK?” Cori asked, glancing at me with a concerned expression on her face as she reached across the seat and touched my arm.
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m good.” I replied. “It’s just, I never… shit. I don’t know. I.. All day today, you’ve made me feel like the most important person in the world. At school, everybody just ignores me, or makes fun of me because of the way I look or whatever. And.. and you never did that. You never ignored me, or made fun of me or anything else.” Tears were starting in my eyes. “And then today… today was just amazing and, and… I love you, Cori. I love you so much…” Squeezing my eyes shut just seemed to push the tears out faster. Shit. What an idiot. Wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, I glanced toward my sister. Her eyes were shiny as she alternated looking at me and the road ahead. “Sorry. I uh, um. Sorry.” I said again, ducking my head and turning to look out the window.
“I love you, too, Jason. You know that” Cori replied, gently squeezing my arm again.
“Yeah, Cori. I know. But.. I… shit!” I turned to face my sister as my words came spilling out. “Cori, you’re all I ever think about. I love you. I compare all the girls at school to you, and they all lose. I love you. I’m IN love with you. I dream about you, I fantasize about you. I just want to be with you, spend time with you. God. You start school in a couple weeks & you’ll meet a bunch of new people and… and..” I dashed my hand across my eyes again. “And you’ll be busy and I’ll never see you and you’ll have a boyfriend and get married and move away and l love you and I miss you already and I can’t do it… I just can’t…”
I covered my face in my hands, tears streaming down my face. I was slammed against my seat belt and we were stopping hard on the side of the road, much to the annoyance of the other drivers flying by.
I heard the gearshift hit park and Cori’s seatbelt latch release. She gathered me into her arms and pulled my head to her chest. “Oh, Jason.. my Jason..” she whispered into my hair as she held me tight. “My beautiful boy… I love you, too, Jason.” Cori leaned back and lifted my head up to look at my face. Her eyes were almost as wet as mine. She held my face cupped in her hands and looked into my eyes. “Don’t you see? I love you too, Jason.” She kissed me again, so softly I barely felt it. “Why do you think I never had a boyfriend? Because I’ve been waiting for you.” Another gentle kiss. “You, my love.”
Tears were running down her face as she held me. I wrapped my arms around her and held on tight, I was never letting go. My sister kissed the top of my head again. My thoughts were racing as I replayed her words to me. Now that I actually thought about it, she never did have a steady boyfriend. She’d go out with groups of friends. She was always surrounded by girls AND boys, and I’d always just assumed… How many times, when I was feeling down or whatever, did I look up and there she was.. just sitting there. Never bugging me, never prodding, asking, just .. there. Always, just there.
Every single school academic awards event when I got another slip of paper with my name on it, who was always there, smiling at me? Even though I hated going to her sports award things, and I sat with my head down the whole time and talked to no one, who did she always show her trophy to first? And before that, when we were younger, I’d see her in the school hallways all the time. I never really thought about it before, but she couldn’t possibly have had classes so close to mine that she was always there, could she? Had she been looking out for me, all this time? Oh my god! She held my hand on my first day of kindergarten! She made sure I was OK every day of my life and I never noticed!
I loosened my arms enough to lean back and look at her face. Tears running down her cheeks had made her eye makeup a bit of a mess. And she was STILL the most beautiful girl in the world. “I love you, Cori. I love you forever and ever” I whispered to my darling sister.
“I love you, too, Jason” my sister whispered to me.
Leaning forward, our lips met and we kissed…